I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
