nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
