I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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