Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Randomize
