That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I can tuck mytits in my pants
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
