did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
