imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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