so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I need moral support for this bender
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
