She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
