I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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