i don't like sucking hair
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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