i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
