I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
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