I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
