fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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