Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
