Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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