maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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