i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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