I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
