his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize
