thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
