what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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