I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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