so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
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