I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
