College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
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