you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
