i wish there were pregnant emoticons
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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