You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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