I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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