Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
