dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
