I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
She needs sedatives and a leash
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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