I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Randomize
