The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
