Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
