the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
