She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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