And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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