I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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