ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
operation have a gay friend backfired
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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