wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
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