The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
