I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
