As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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