I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
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Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
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You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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