i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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