office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
