Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
