You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
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At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
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I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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